A jobless man applied for the position of 'office boy' at Microsoft.
The HR manager interviewed him, then gave him a test: clean the floor. The man passed the test with flying colors.
"You are hired," HR manager informed the applicant, "give me your e-mail address, and I'll send you the application for employment, as well as the date you should report for work.
The man replied " I don't have a computer, or an email!"
"I'm sorry," said the HR manager. "If you don't have an email, that means you do not exist. And we cannot hire persons who do not exist."
The man was very disappointed.
He didn't know what to do. He only had $10 with him. Once that is spent, he won't have any money to buy any food.
He went to the supermarket and bought a crate of tomatoes with his $10.
He went from door to door and sold the tomatoes in less than two hours. He doubled his money.
He repeated the operation three times, and returned home with $60. He realized that he can survive
this way. He started to go everyday earlier, and return late.
this way. He started to go everyday earlier, and return late.
He doubled or tripled his money every day. Soon, he bought a cart, then a truck. In a very short time, he had his own fleet of delivery vehicles.
Five years later, the man became one of the biggest food retailers in the U. S. He started to plan his family's future, and decided to have a life insurance.
He called an insurance broker, and chose a protection plan.
At the end of the conversation, the broker asked him for his email address.
The man replied: ' I don't have an email.'
The broker was dumbfounded. "You don't have an email, and yet have succeeded in building an empire. Can you imagine what you could have been if you had an email?," he exclaimed.
The man thought for a while, and replied, "an office boy at Microsoft!"
If you just lost your Job or Just failed an Interview Don't worry be Optimistic..... Good days are on the way and something better is reserved for you.
WHEN A LIZARD CAN, WHY CAN'T WE?
WHEN A LIZARD CAN, WHY CAN'T WE?
This is a true story that happened in Japan. In order to renovate the house, someone in Japan breaks open the wall.
Japanese houses normally have a hollow space between the wooden walls.
When tearing down the walls, he found that there was a lizard stuck there because a nail from outside hammered into one of its feet. He sees this, feels pity, and at the same time curious, as when he checked the nail, it was nailed 10 years ago when the house was first built.
What happened?
The lizard has survived in such position for 10 years!!!!!!!!!!
In a dark wall partition for 10 years without moving, it is impossible and mind-boggling. Then he wondered how this lizard survived for 10 years!!! Without moving a single step - since its foot was nailed!
So he stopped his work and observed the lizard, what it has been doing, and what and how it has been eating.
Later, not knowing from where it came appears another lizard, with food in its mouth.
Ah! He was stunned and touched deeply.
For the lizard, that was stuck by nail, another lizard has been feeding it for the past 10 years...
Imagine? it has been doing that untiringly for 10 long years, without giving up hope on its partner.
Think, will you do that to your partner?
Think that will you do it to your Mom, Who brought you after a big struggle of nine long months?
Or at least to your Dad, Friends, Co-workers, brothers and Sisters?
Imagine what a small creature can do that a creature blessed with a brilliant mind can't.
As information and communication technology advances, our access to information becomes faster and faster.
But the Distance between human beings . . . is it getting closer as well?
Please never abandon your loved ones.
Never Say You Are Busy When They Really Need You ...
You May Have The Entire World At Your Feet.....
But You Might Be The Only World To Them....
A Moment of negligence might break the very heart which loves you thru all odds..
Before you say something just remember…It takes a moment to Break but an entire life to make....
To Live Use Heart and to Survive use Brains.
Then Life would be a paradise Unfurling only Love Joy and Happiness....
"Love is the ocean which accepts all manner of the rivers without questioning their origin."
***************************************************************************
Its better to lose your ego to the one you love
Than to loose the one you love ... Because of ego.
A relationship doesn't shine by just shaking hands in good times.
But it blossoms by holding firmly in critical situations.
ﻋﻼﻣﮧ ﺍﻗﺒﺎﻝؒ Allama Iqbal
ﺩﻭﺳﺘﻮﮞ ﻣﯿﮟ ﺳﮯ ﮐﺴﯽ ﻧﮯ ﮐﮩﺎ " : ﺣﻀﺮﺕ ﯾﮧ ﻣﮑﺎﻥ ﮐﺴﯽ ﺑﮭﯽ ﻭﻗﺖ ﮔﺮ ﺳﮑﺘﺎ ﮨﮯ"
ﺍﻗﺒﺎﻝؒ ﻧﮯ ﺟﻮﺍﺏ ﺩﯾﺎ " : ﮨﺎﮞ ﯾﮧ ﻣﯿﺮﯼ ﺩﻋﺎﺅﮞ ﮨﯽ ﺳﮯ ﻗﺎﺋﻢ ﮨﮯ ۔۔ "
ﭘﻮﭼﮭﺎ ﮔﯿﺎ " : ﺁﭖ ﺍﺗﻨﺎ ﮐﺮﺍﯾﮧ ﺑﮭﯽ ﺩﯾﺘﮯ ﮨﯿﮟ ۔۔ ﺍﺱ ﮐﺮﺍﺋﮯ ﻣﯿﮟ ﺳﮯ ﺗﻮ ﮐﮩﯿﮟ ﺯﯾﺎﺩﮦ ﺑﮩﺘﺮ ﻣﮑﺎﻥ ﺁﭖ ﮐﻮ ﻣﻞ ﺳﮑﺘﺎ ﮨﮯ ۔۔ " ﻋﻼﻣﮧ ﻧﮯ ﮐﮩﺎ "
: ﺁﭖ ﭨﮭﯿﮏ ﮐﮩﺘﮯ ﮨﯿﮟ ﻟﯿﮑﻦ ﺁﭖ ﮐﻮ ﻧﮩﯿﮟ ﻣﻌﻠﻮﻡ ﮐﮧ ﯾﮧ ﻣﮑﺎﻥ ﺍﯾﮏ ﮨﻨﺪﻭ ﺑﯿﻮﮦ ﮐﺎ ﮨﮯ ﺟﺲ ﮐﮯ ﺑﭽﻮﮞ ﮐﯽ ﮔﺰﺭﺍﻭﻗﺎﺕ ﺍﺳﯽ ﻣﮑﺎﻥ ﮐﮯ ﮐﺮﺍﺋﮯ ﭘﺮ ﮨﮯ ۔۔ ﻣﺠﮭﮯ ﯾﮧ ﮐﻮﭨﮭﯽ ﺧﺎﻟﯽ ﮐﺮﻧﮯ ﯾﺎ ﮐﺮﺍﯾﮧ ﮐﻢ ﮐﺮﻭﺍﻧﮯ ﻣﯿﮟ ﺷﺮﻡ ﺁﺗﯽ ﮨﮯ !!۔۔۔۔۔۔
کوبرا ناگ کا رد عمل
ترکهان دکان بند کر کے گهر گیا تو کہیں سے گهومتا پهرتا ایک سیاہ کوبرا ناگ اس کی ورکشاپ میں گهس آیا. یہاں بظاہر تو ناگ کی دلچسپی کی کوئی چیز نہیں تهی پهر بهی ادهر سے ادهر اور اوپر سے نیچے جائزہ لیتا پهر رہا تها کہ اس کا دهڑ وہاں پڑی ایک آری سے ٹکرا کر بہت معمولی سا زخمی ہو گیا.
گهبراہٹ میں ناگ نے پلٹ کر آری پر پوری قوت سے ڈنگ مارا. فولادی آری پر زور سے لگے ڈنگ نے آری کا کیا بگاڑنا تها الٹا ناگ کے منہ سے خون بہنا شروع ہو گیا.
اس بار خشونت اور تکبر میں ناگ نے اپنی سوچ کے مطابق آری کے گرد لپٹ کر، اسے جکڑ کر اور دم گهونٹ کر مارنے کی پوری کوشش کر ڈالی.
دوسرے دن جب ترکهان نے ورکشاپ کهولی تو ایک ناگ کو آری کے گرد لپٹے مردہ پایا جو کسی اور وجہ سے نہیں محض اپنی طیش اور غصے کی بهینٹ چڑھ گیا تها.
کہانی بهلے جاندار نا ہو، عبرت اور سبق کیلئے چند اچهی باتیں اس سے اخذ ہوتی ہیں کہ:
بعض اوقات غصے میں ہم دوسروں کو نقصان پہنچانے کی کوشش کرتے ہیں، مگر وقت گزرنے کے بعد ہمیں پتہ چلتا ہے کہ ہم نے اپنے آپ کا زیادہ نقصان کیا ہے.
اچهی زندگی کیلئے بعض اوقات ہمیں
کچھ چیزوں کو
کچھ لوگوں کو
کچھ حوادث کو
کچھ کاموں کو
کچھ باتوں کو
نظر انداز کرنا چاہیئے.
اپنے آپ کو ذہانت کے ساتھ نظر انداز کرنے کا عادی بنائیے، ضروری نہیں کہ ہم ہر عمل کا ایک رد عمل دکهائیں. ہمارے کچھ رد عمل ہمیں محض نقصان ہی نہیں دیں گے بلکہ ہو سکتا ہے کہ ہماری جان بهی لے لیں.
گهبراہٹ میں ناگ نے پلٹ کر آری پر پوری قوت سے ڈنگ مارا. فولادی آری پر زور سے لگے ڈنگ نے آری کا کیا بگاڑنا تها الٹا ناگ کے منہ سے خون بہنا شروع ہو گیا.
اس بار خشونت اور تکبر میں ناگ نے اپنی سوچ کے مطابق آری کے گرد لپٹ کر، اسے جکڑ کر اور دم گهونٹ کر مارنے کی پوری کوشش کر ڈالی.
دوسرے دن جب ترکهان نے ورکشاپ کهولی تو ایک ناگ کو آری کے گرد لپٹے مردہ پایا جو کسی اور وجہ سے نہیں محض اپنی طیش اور غصے کی بهینٹ چڑھ گیا تها.
کہانی بهلے جاندار نا ہو، عبرت اور سبق کیلئے چند اچهی باتیں اس سے اخذ ہوتی ہیں کہ:
بعض اوقات غصے میں ہم دوسروں کو نقصان پہنچانے کی کوشش کرتے ہیں، مگر وقت گزرنے کے بعد ہمیں پتہ چلتا ہے کہ ہم نے اپنے آپ کا زیادہ نقصان کیا ہے.
اچهی زندگی کیلئے بعض اوقات ہمیں
کچھ چیزوں کو
کچھ لوگوں کو
کچھ حوادث کو
کچھ کاموں کو
کچھ باتوں کو
نظر انداز کرنا چاہیئے.
اپنے آپ کو ذہانت کے ساتھ نظر انداز کرنے کا عادی بنائیے، ضروری نہیں کہ ہم ہر عمل کا ایک رد عمل دکهائیں. ہمارے کچھ رد عمل ہمیں محض نقصان ہی نہیں دیں گے بلکہ ہو سکتا ہے کہ ہماری جان بهی لے لیں.
Bypassing the Bypass
Dr Syed Zair Hussain Rizvi
EVERY SEED OF POMEGRANATE WHICH GOES IN YOUR STOMACH IS A SEED OF LIFE FOR YOUR HEART
Two things are full of benefits for the human being, lukewarm water and pomegranate. Pomegranate is a seasonal fruit in Pakistan so I tried an experiment with dried pomegranate seeds(DRY ANARDANA), prepared a decoction boiling the fistful of dried seeds in half litre of water for 10 minutes, squeezed the seeds, strained the decoction and advised those patients suffering from painful angina to use a glass of lukewarm decoction on an empty stomach in the morning, amazing result was observed, the decoction of dried pomegranate seeds worked like a magic, the feelings of tightness and heaviness of chest and the pain had gone.
It encouraged me to try more experiments on all types of cardiac patients so I tried other experiments on patients who were suffering from painful angina, coronary arterial blockage, cardiac ischemia (insufficient blood flow to the heart muscle) etc, waiting for a bypass surgery, the same lukewarm decoction was used empty stomach in the morning, the patients experienced quick relief in all symptoms including painful condition
In another case of coronary arterial blockage the patient started using half glass of fresh pomegranate juice everyday for one year, although all symptoms were completely relieved within a week but he continued taking it for a whole year, it completely reversed the plaque build-up and unblocked his arteries to normal, the angiography report confirmed the evidence, thus decoction of dried pomegranate seeds, fresh pomegranate juice or eating a whole pomegranate on empty stomach in the morning proved to be a miracle cure for cardiac patients.
But the lukewarm dried seeds decoction proved to be more effective compared to eating a whole pomegranate or fresh pomegranate juice, use of pomegranate in any way has demonstrated even more dramatic effects as blood thinner, pain killing properties for cardiac patients, lowers LDL (low-density lipoprotein or bad cholesterol) and raises the HDL (high-density lipoprotein or good cholesterol) , there are more than 50 different types of heart diseases the most common being coronary artery disease (CAD), which is the number one killer of both women and men in some countries, and there has been no medicinal cure for this disease, many cardiac patients have reversed their heart diseases on my advice using one glass of lukewarm decoction of pomegranate dried seeds, half glass of fresh pomegranate juice or eating a whole pomegranate on empty stomach in the morning, it was the very first real breakthrough in the history of cardiology to successfully treat the
cardiac diseases by a fruit, The more super foods to obtain the even faster results for cardiac patients which are most promising curative and protective agents like fresh raisins, quince, guava, prunes (dried plums), natural vinegar, mixture of grape fruit juice and honey in the morning (empty stomach), basil leaves, chicory leaves, powder of oregano leaves and rock salt in equal quantity (in case the patient is not hypertensive) and sesame oil as cooking oil for cardiac patients.
It is regretted to say that treating the heart patients and bypass surgery has become far more profitable business around the world which has failed to help avert life threatening heart attacks and life time cardiac complications resulting in almost paralyzed life. A regular use of pomegranate in any way ensures a healthy cardiac life, thinning your blood, dissolving the blood clots and obstruction inside the coronary arteries, maintains an optimal blood flow, supports a healthy blood pressure, prevents and reverses atherosclerosis. (Thickening of the internal lining of the blood vessels) from whatever I experienced and observed in last several years, I can say:
“A pomegranate a day keeps the cardiologist away� you can try and see the wonder.
source: Professionals-of-Pakistan
EVERY SEED OF POMEGRANATE WHICH GOES IN YOUR STOMACH IS A SEED OF LIFE FOR YOUR HEART
Two things are full of benefits for the human being, lukewarm water and pomegranate. Pomegranate is a seasonal fruit in Pakistan so I tried an experiment with dried pomegranate seeds(DRY ANARDANA), prepared a decoction boiling the fistful of dried seeds in half litre of water for 10 minutes, squeezed the seeds, strained the decoction and advised those patients suffering from painful angina to use a glass of lukewarm decoction on an empty stomach in the morning, amazing result was observed, the decoction of dried pomegranate seeds worked like a magic, the feelings of tightness and heaviness of chest and the pain had gone.
It encouraged me to try more experiments on all types of cardiac patients so I tried other experiments on patients who were suffering from painful angina, coronary arterial blockage, cardiac ischemia (insufficient blood flow to the heart muscle) etc, waiting for a bypass surgery, the same lukewarm decoction was used empty stomach in the morning, the patients experienced quick relief in all symptoms including painful condition
In another case of coronary arterial blockage the patient started using half glass of fresh pomegranate juice everyday for one year, although all symptoms were completely relieved within a week but he continued taking it for a whole year, it completely reversed the plaque build-up and unblocked his arteries to normal, the angiography report confirmed the evidence, thus decoction of dried pomegranate seeds, fresh pomegranate juice or eating a whole pomegranate on empty stomach in the morning proved to be a miracle cure for cardiac patients.
But the lukewarm dried seeds decoction proved to be more effective compared to eating a whole pomegranate or fresh pomegranate juice, use of pomegranate in any way has demonstrated even more dramatic effects as blood thinner, pain killing properties for cardiac patients, lowers LDL (low-density lipoprotein or bad cholesterol) and raises the HDL (high-density lipoprotein or good cholesterol) , there are more than 50 different types of heart diseases the most common being coronary artery disease (CAD), which is the number one killer of both women and men in some countries, and there has been no medicinal cure for this disease, many cardiac patients have reversed their heart diseases on my advice using one glass of lukewarm decoction of pomegranate dried seeds, half glass of fresh pomegranate juice or eating a whole pomegranate on empty stomach in the morning, it was the very first real breakthrough in the history of cardiology to successfully treat the
cardiac diseases by a fruit, The more super foods to obtain the even faster results for cardiac patients which are most promising curative and protective agents like fresh raisins, quince, guava, prunes (dried plums), natural vinegar, mixture of grape fruit juice and honey in the morning (empty stomach), basil leaves, chicory leaves, powder of oregano leaves and rock salt in equal quantity (in case the patient is not hypertensive) and sesame oil as cooking oil for cardiac patients.
It is regretted to say that treating the heart patients and bypass surgery has become far more profitable business around the world which has failed to help avert life threatening heart attacks and life time cardiac complications resulting in almost paralyzed life. A regular use of pomegranate in any way ensures a healthy cardiac life, thinning your blood, dissolving the blood clots and obstruction inside the coronary arteries, maintains an optimal blood flow, supports a healthy blood pressure, prevents and reverses atherosclerosis. (Thickening of the internal lining of the blood vessels) from whatever I experienced and observed in last several years, I can say:
“A pomegranate a day keeps the cardiologist away� you can try and see the wonder.
source: Professionals-of-Pakistan
Which employee type are you ?
Employee "A" in a company walked up to his manager and asked what my job is for the day? The manager took "A" to the bank of a river and asked him to cross the river and reach the other side of the bank. "A" completed this task successfully and reported back to the manager about the completion of the task assigned. The manager smiled and said "GOOD JOB"
Next day Employee "B" reported to the same manager and asked him the job for the day. The manager assigned the same task as above to this person also. The Employee "B' before starting the task saw Employee "C" struggling in the river to reach the other side of the bank. He realized "C" has the same task. Now "B" not only crossed the river but also helped "C" to cross the river. "B" reported back to the manager and the manager smiled and said "VERY GOOD JOB"
The following day Employee "Q" reported to the same manager and asked him the job for the day. The manager assigned the same task again. Employee "Q" before starting the work did some home work and realized "A", "B" "C" all has done this task before. He met them and understood how they performed. He realized that there is a need for a guide and training for doing this task. He sat first and wrote down the procedure for crossing the river, he documented the common mistakes people made, and tricks to do the task efficiently and effortlessly. Using the methodology he had written down he crossed the river and reported back to the manager along with documented procedure and training material. The manger said "Q" you have done an "EXCELLENT JOB".
The following day Employee "O' reported to the manager and asked him the job for the day. The manager assigned the same task again. "O" studied the procedure written down by "Q" and sat and thought about the whole task. He realized company is spending lot of money in getting this task completed. He decided not to cross the river, but sat and designed and implemented a bridge across the river and went back to his manager and said, "You no longer need to assign this task to any one". The manager smiled and said "Outstanding job 'O'. I am very proud of you."
What is the difference between A, B, Q O? Many a times in life we get tasks to be done at home, at office, at play.,
Most of us end up doing what is expected out of us. Do we feel happy? Most probably yes. We would be often disappointed when the recognition is not meeting our expectation. Let us compare ourselves with "B". Helping someone else the problem often improves our own skills. There is an old proverb (I do not know the author) "learn to teach and teach to learn". From a company point of view "B" has demonstrated much better skills than "A" since one more task for the company is completed.
"Q" created knowledge base for the team. More often than not, we do the task assigned to us without checking history. Learning from other's mistake is the best way to improve efficiency. This knowledge creation for the team is of immense help. Re-usability reduces cost there by increases productivity of the team. "Q" demonstrated good "team-player" skills,
Now to the outstanding person, "O" made the task irrelevant; he created a Permanent Asset to the team.
If you notice B, Q and O all have demonstrated "team performance" over and above individual performance; they have also demonstrated a very invaluable characteristic known as "INITIATIVE".
Initiative pays of everywhere whether at work or at personal life. If you have initiative you will succeed. Initiative is a continual process and it never ends. This is because this year's achievement is next year's task. You cannot use the same success story every year. The story provides an instance of performance, where as measurement needs to be spread across at least 6-12 months. Consequently performance should be consistent and evenly spread. Out-of-Box thinkers are always premium and that is what everyone constantly looks out for. Initiative, Out-of-Box thinking and commitment are the stepping stone to success.
Initiative should be lifelong. Think of out of the box…..Happy Working
source: http://paradigmwisdom.blogspot.com/
source: http://paradigmwisdom.blogspot.com/
3 Don'ts n 3 Dos (for Children)
IN Quran Allah Says:
" teary Rub nay hukum diya k tum usi ki ibadat karo aur waldain k saath ehsaan karo. Agar tumharay saamnay in mein say kisi ik ka burhapa aa jaiey ya donoon ka to (2 don'ts)
1.ufff tak mat kaho,
2. Unko danto mat.
(Now 3 Dos):
1.Acchi baat unko kaho,
2.aajizi say bazoo ko un k liye jhuka do,
3. (Aur is tarah dua kartay huay) kaho meray Rub in Donoon par raham jis tarah unho nay bachpan mein meri tarbiyat o parwarish ki....aameen
" teary Rub nay hukum diya k tum usi ki ibadat karo aur waldain k saath ehsaan karo. Agar tumharay saamnay in mein say kisi ik ka burhapa aa jaiey ya donoon ka to (2 don'ts)
1.ufff tak mat kaho,
2. Unko danto mat.
(Now 3 Dos):
1.Acchi baat unko kaho,
2.aajizi say bazoo ko un k liye jhuka do,
3. (Aur is tarah dua kartay huay) kaho meray Rub in Donoon par raham jis tarah unho nay bachpan mein meri tarbiyat o parwarish ki....aameen
Story: Giving Comments about others
Once an old man spread rumors that his neighbor was a thief. As a result, the young man was arrested. Days later the young man was proven innocent.
After being released he sued the old man for wrongly accusing him.
In the court, the old man told the Judge: "They were just comments, didn't harm anyone."
The judge told the old man: "Write all the things you said about him on a piece of paper. Cut them up and on the way home, throw the pieces of paper out. Tomorrow, come back to hear the sentence."
Next day, the judge told the old man: "Before the hearing starts, go out and gather all the pieces of paper that you threw out yesterday."
The old man said: "I can't do that! The wind spread them and I won't know where to find them."
The judge then replied: "The same way, simple comments may destroy the honor of a man to such an extent that one is not able to fix it. If you can't speak well of someone, rather don't say anything."
Giving comments about others have several disadvantages:
1- we become slaves of our words what we have uttered.
2- We lose our own respect in society/colleagues because of doing consistent character assassination.
3- Most of time, we are not sure whether we are right or wrong because being human our judgment can be wrong so we fall in the category of liars.
4- Negative trait of our personality becomes prominent which becomes of character in the long run.
The law of the seed
Take a look at an apple tree. There might be five hundred apples on the tree, each with ten seeds. That's a lot of seeds!
We might ask, "Why would you need so many seeds to grow just a few more trees?"
Nature has something to teach us here. It's telling us: "Most seeds never grow. So if you really want to make something happen, you better try more than once."
This might mean:You'll attend twenty interviews to get one job.
You'll interview forty people to find one good employee.
You'll talk to fifty people to sell one house, car, vacuum cleaner, idea...
And you might meet a hundred acquaintances to find one special friend.
When we understand the "Law of the Seed", we don't get so disappointed.
We stop feeling like victims. Laws of nature are not things to take personally.
We might ask, "Why would you need so many seeds to grow just a few more trees?"
Nature has something to teach us here. It's telling us: "Most seeds never grow. So if you really want to make something happen, you better try more than once."
This might mean:You'll attend twenty interviews to get one job.
You'll interview forty people to find one good employee.
You'll talk to fifty people to sell one house, car, vacuum cleaner, idea...
And you might meet a hundred acquaintances to find one special friend.
When we understand the "Law of the Seed", we don't get so disappointed.
We stop feeling like victims. Laws of nature are not things to take personally.
| source: http://paradigmwisdom.blogspot.com/ |
The story of 100 Rupees
The story of 100 Rupees:
*In the National Assembly,** Islamabad**, a PPP MNA, during his speech,
told a story.....*
"Once upon a time a father gave 100 rupees each to his 3 sons and asked
them to buy things and fill up a room completely.
1st son bought a bulk of hay for Rs 100 but couldn't fill the room entirely.
2nd son bought a pile of cotton for Rs 100 but couldn't fill the room
entirely.
3rd son bought a candle for Rs 1, lit up the candle, the room was filled
with light."
The PPP MNA added, "Our President Zardari is like the 3rd son. Since the
day he has taken charge of his office, our country is filled with the
bright light of prosperity"
A voice from the backbench MNA, Usman Bhai from Karachi, questioned:
Woh sub to theek hai, per baaqi 99 Rupay kahan hain... ???
*In the National Assembly,** Islamabad**, a PPP MNA, during his speech,
told a story.....*
"Once upon a time a father gave 100 rupees each to his 3 sons and asked
them to buy things and fill up a room completely.
1st son bought a bulk of hay for Rs 100 but couldn't fill the room entirely.
2nd son bought a pile of cotton for Rs 100 but couldn't fill the room
entirely.
3rd son bought a candle for Rs 1, lit up the candle, the room was filled
with light."
The PPP MNA added, "Our President Zardari is like the 3rd son. Since the
day he has taken charge of his office, our country is filled with the
bright light of prosperity"
A voice from the backbench MNA, Usman Bhai from Karachi, questioned:
Woh sub to theek hai, per baaqi 99 Rupay kahan hain... ???
Marriage According to Qur'an and Sunnah
Bismillaahir Rahmaanir Raheem
Assalamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barkatuh!
According to Qur'an and Sunnah
And those who say: "Our Lord! Bestow on us
from our wives and our offspring
who will be the comfort of our eyes,
and make us leaders for the Muttaqûn"
Those will be rewarded with the highest place
(in Paradise) because of their patience.
Therein they shall be met with greetings
and the word of peace and respect.
(Qur'an 25:74-75)
The
order to Marry
Hadith - Sahih Bukhari Volume 7, Book
62, No. 1, Narrated Anas bin Malik
A group of three men came to the houses of the
wives of the Prophet
asking how the Prophet worshipped (Allah), and when they were
informed about that, they considered their worship insufficient and said,
"Where are we from the Prophet as his past and future sins have been forgiven."
Then one of them said, "I will offer the prayer throughout the night forever."
The other said, "I will fast throughout the year and will not break my fast."
The third said, "I will keep away from the women and will not marry forever."
Allah's Apostle came to them and said, "Are you the same people who said
so-and-so? By Allah, I am more submissive to Allah and more afraid of Him
than you; yet I fast and break my fast, I do sleep and I also marry women.
So he who does not follow my tradition in religion, is not from me (not one
of my followers)."
Hadith - Sahih Bukhari, Volume 7, Book
62, Number 4, Narrated 'Abdullah
We were with the Prophet while we were young
and had no wealth whatever. So Allah's Apostle said, "O young people! Whoever
among you can marry, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and
guard his modesty (i.e. his private parts from committing illegal sexual
intercourse etc.), and whoever is not able to marry, should fast, as fasting
diminishes his sexual power."
Al-Mahr
(The Dowry)
The Noble Qur'an 4:4
And give to the women (whom you marry) their
Mahr (obligatory bridal money given by the husband to his wife at the time
of marriage) with a good heart, but if they, of their own good pleasure,
remit any part of it to you, take it, and enjoy it without fear of any harm.
The
Limit of What can be seen of the Woman
Whom One Seeks to Marry
Sheikh Ibn Baz, May Allah have Mercy on
him
Question: If a young man proposes marriage to a young lady
is it obligatory that he sees her? Also, is it correct that the young lady
uncover her head to show more of her beauty to her proposing fiance? Please
benefit us and may Allaah benefit you.
Answer: There is no harm (in the man seeing her), however it
is not obligatory. Rather, it is recommended that he sees her and she sees
him, because the Prophet (Sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam) commanded the one
who proposed marriage to look at the woman. This is because that is better
for causing agreement and harmony between them. So if she uncovers her face
for him, and her hands and her head, there is no harm in that according to
the correct opinion. Some of the people of knowledge have said that it is
sufficient for her to uncover the face and the two hands. However, the correct
opinion is that there is no harm in him seeing her head, face, hands and
feet, based upon the mentioned hadeeth (above). However, this is not
permissible with him being alone with her. Rather, her father, or brother,
or someone else must be with them. This is because the Prophet (Sallallaahu
'alayhi wa sallam) said, "A man must never be alone
with a woman unless there is someone who is a Mahram with them." (Agreed
upon in Saheeh Al-Bukhaaree and Saheeh Muslim.) He (Sallallaahu 'alayhi wa
sallam) also said, "A man must never be alone with
a woman, for verily the Satan is their third." (At-Tirmithee and Ahmad)
Source: Sheikh ibn Baz, Al-Fataawaa ash-Shar'iyyah
fil-Masaa'il il-'Asriyyah min Fataawaa 'Ulamaa' il-Balad il-Haraam, pp. 498-499.
Translated by Aqeel Walker
Rights
over one another
Hadith - Bukhari, Volume 3, Book 50, Number
882. Narrated Uqba bin Amir
Allah's Apostle
said,
"From among all
the conditions which you have to fulfill, the conditions which make it legal
for you to have sexual relations (i.e. the marriage contract) have the greatest
right to be fulfilled."
The following examples of behavior
of a husband are haram (prohibited) and can lead to disobedience (to Allah)
in the wife.
Al-Bahuti al-Hanbali, Kishaaf al-Qinaa’
an Matn al-Iqnaa’, vol. 5, pp. 184, 290, 213; Ibn Abideen, Radd al-Mukhtar
ala al-Darr al-Mukhtar wa Hashiyah, vol. 3, p. 190; Tafseer al-Manaar, vol.
5, p. 76.
"He [the husband] may cause his wife different
forms of harm, such as cursing her or her family, reviling her, verbally
abusing her for the tiniest of reasons. He may insult her because of her
family, if it is less prestigious or honorable than his. Or he may try to
bring harm to her by divorcing her and then, before the waiting period is
finished, bring her back as his wife and then divorce her again. All this
is done without the intention of returning to a real married life but simply
to harm her and transgress her rights. Or he may avoid having sexual intercourse
with her for no reason or legal sanction. This may lead the woman to lose
her chastity and doing something forbidden."
The Noble Qur'an Al-Baqarah
2:228
...And they (women) have rights (over their
husbands as regards living expenses, etc.) similar (to those of their husbands)
over them (as regards obedience and respect, etc.) to what is reasonable,
but men have a degree (of responsibility) over them. And Allâh is
All-Mighty, All-Wise.
Hadith - Al-Tirmidhi, Narrated Amr ibn
al-Ahwas al-Jushami
The Prophet
said,
"...Listen! You
have your rights upon your wives and they have their rights upon you. Your
right is that they shall not allow anyone you dislike, to trample your bed
and do not permit those whom you dislike to enter your home. Their right
is that you should treat them well in the matter of food and
clothing."
Hadith - Sahih Al-Bukhari 3.189, Narrated
Abu Juhaifa
Salman told Abu Ad-Darda', "Your Lord has a
right on you, your soul has a right on you, and your family has a right on
you; so you should give the rights of all those who has a right on you."
Abu Ad-Darda' came to the Prophet and narrated the whole story. The Prophet
said,
"Salman has spoken
the truth."
Hadith - Sahih Al-Bukhari 3.501, Narrated
Abu Huraira
...The Prophet
said,
"The best amongst
you is the one who pays the rights of others generously."
Hadith - Al-Tirmidhi #276, Narrated Amr
ibn al-Ahwas al-Jushami
Amr heard the Prophet
say in his farewell address on the eve of his Last Pilgrimage,
after he had glorified and praised Allah, he cautioned his followers:
'Listen! Treat women kindly; they are like prisoners
in your hands. Beyond this you do not owe anything from them. Should they
be guilty of flagrant misbehaviour, you may remove them from your beds, and
beat them but do not inflict upon them any severe punishment. Then if they
obey you, do not have recourse to anything else against them. Listen! You
have your rights upon your wives and they have their rights upon you. Your
right is that they shall not allow anyone you dislike, to trample your bed
and do not permit those whom you dislike to enter your home. Their right
is that you should treat them well in the matter of food and clothing.'
[Transmitted
by Tirmidhi]
The Noble Qur'an 5:1
O you who believe! Fulfill (your) obligations.
...
Words of Advice to the Husband and the Wife
by: Sheikh al Albaani
The husband and wife need to be compliant,
cooperative and conciliatory toward one another, and to advise each other
and urge each other toward obedience to Allah subhana wa ta'ala, following
all of His ruling which have been clearly established in the Qur'an and the
Sunnah. These must never be superceded by blind following of any religious
or other figures, or any custom or school of thought which has predominated
among the people.
Allah aza wa jal says "It is not for a believer, man or
woman, when Allâh and His Messenger have decreed a matter that they
should have any option in their decision. And whoever disobeys Allâh
and His Messenger, he has indeed strayed in a plain error.
" [al ahzab:33-36]
Each of them should fully carry out the duties
and responsibilities with which Allah has obligated them toward the other...thus,
the wife should not try to have all of the same rights as her husband, and
the husband must never exploit the role of leadership and authority to which
he has been assigned in the marriage relationship to oppress her, strike
her or to be otherwise unfair to her.
Allah says: "And women shall have rights similar
to the rights against them, according to what is equitable; but men have
a degree of advantage over them. And Allah is Exalted in Power, Wise. [al
baqarah:228]
Allah also says, "Men are the protectors and
maintainers of women, because Allâh has made one of them to excel the
other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means. Therefore
the righteous women are devoutly obedient (to Allâh and to their husbands),
and guard in the husband's absence what Allâh orders them to guard
(e.g. their chastity, their husband's property, etc.). As to those women
on whose part you see illconduct, admonish them (first), (next), refuse
to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful), but
if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance).
Surely, Allâh is Ever Most High, Most Great.
" [an-nisaa:34]
Mu'awiya ibn Haida radi Allahu anhu said "O
rasulullah, what rights do our wives have over us?" Rasulullah salallahu
alayhi wa sallam said "That you should feed them as you feed yourselves,
clothe them as you clothe yourselves, never invoke ugliness upon them, (referring
to the custom of the Arabs when they are angry they say 'May Allah make your
face ugly) never strike them in the face, and in boycotting the marital bed,
do not go outside of the house to sleep. How (could you do any of these things)
after you have entered into one another, so do only that which is allowed
with regard to her (for valid reasons). [ahmed/sahih]
In another hadith rasulullah sallallahu alayhi
wa sallam said "The doers of justice will be on thrones of light at Allah's
right Hand and both of Allah's hands are right hands- whose who were just
in their ruling, with their families and in all that over which there were
given authority." [Muslim]
When they both know and practice this, Allah
subhana wa ta'ala grants them a good life and they will live for as long
as they remain together- in the bliss of happiness.
Allah says, "Whoever works
righteousness, man or woman, and has Faith, verily, to him will We give a
new Life, a life that is good and pure, and We will bestow on such their
reward according to the best of their actions." [an nahl:97]
A
Pious Poor Man is a Better Marriage Suitorthan a Rich Man Who
is Not Pious
Hadith - Bukhari 7.28, Narrated
Sahl
A man passed by Allah's Apostle and Allah's
Apostle asked (his companions) "What do you say about this (man)?" They replied,
"If he asks for a lady's hand, he ought to be given her in marriage; and
if he intercedes (for someone) his intercessor should be accepted; and if
he speaks, he should be listened to." Allah's Apostle kept silent, and then
a man from among the poor Muslims passed by, an Allah's Apostle asked (them)
"What do you say about this man?" They replied, "If he asks for a lady's
hand in marriage he does not deserve to be married, and he intercedes (for
someone), his intercession should not be accepted; And if he speaks, he should
not be listened to." Allah's Apostle (saaws) said,
"This poor man
is better than so many of the first as filling the
earth."
Hadith - Al-Tirmidhi #3090, Narrated Abu
Hurairah, r.a.
Allah's Messenger (peace be upon him) said,
'When someone with whose religion and character you are satisfied asks your
daughter in marriage, accede to his request. If you do not do so, there will
be temptation on Earth and extensive corruption.'
[Tirmidhi,
Nasa'i and Ibn Majah transmitted it.]
Action Items for
the
uttaqun:
Single Muslims should
have intentions to marry as soon as Islamically permissible and a suitable
candidate for marriage is available.
For a female,
it is permissible to marry at any time near puberty.
For a man,
he is ordered to marry after puberty once he has established a means to support
a family.
It is recommended
(in order to avoid being jailed) to not marry until old enough according
to the laws in the land they live, but it is Islamically permissible before
that.
Neither should
refuse marriage to a suitable Muslim marriage candidate.
A woman is
permitted (if she so chooses) to marry a poor man of good character, but
she must not marry a non-Muslim.
A muslim man
may only marry a Muslim or non-polytheist christian or Jew who is
chaste.
A mahr/dowry (gift
from the man to the new wife) should be agreed upon before the actual marriage.
The dowry can
be anything halal that they agree upon and it is obligatory that she is given
a dowry. It is recommended that the dowry is something appropriate to his
income level and ability to give.
Although jewelry
is permissible to be given as the dower or part of the dower, it should not
be an imitation of christian traditions, such as a diamond ring worn on the
left third finger and given as part of the marriage
ceremony.
A marriage should
be witnessed by at least two men, or four women, or one man and two
women.
Give your spouse his/her
rights. If your rights are not being given to you, ASK ALLAH for these
rights.
The Prophet (sallallahu aleihi wa sallam) said, "Soon others will be preferred
to you, and there will be things which you will not like." The companions
of the Prophet asked, "O Allah's Apostle! What do you order us to do (in
this case)?" He said, "(I order you) to give the rights that are on you
and to ask your rights from Allah." [Sahih
Al-Bukhari 4.800, Narrated Ibn Masud]
The rights of a husband
include:
Halal marital relations
to the degree that they are able
That the wife will
guard in the husband's absence what Allah has ordered her to guard (i.e.
her chastity, his property, secrets in the bed between the
two)
That she would not
fast while in his presence, without his permission.
If it is an
obligatory fast, he still has rights to deny it if he has a valid reason,
such as believing that the fast would be a severe risk to her health, and
he must allow the obligatory fast of Ramadan if there is no valid reason
to forbid it.
As to when
she is to make up the Ramadan fast days that she did not make due to her
menstrual, he must cooperate with her desires to make it up promptly, but
he still can deny that the fast be done at certain times as he decides what
he believes is best for her and for the marriage overall.
For non-obligated
fasts, he should encourage the piety of fasting in general, but he is
not obligated to permit each request to fast if they will be in each
other's presence during the fast.
To move the wife,
have her travel with him, or to have up to four wives unless previously
stipulated before marriage
That she will not
spend his money against his halal orders
That she will not
permit anyone to enter his house except with his
permission
If seeing ill behavior
from the wife, he has the right to first admonish her, then after
that he may refuse to share the bed, then he may beat her lightly
(in a way that does not leave marks or damage the body, as this is for a
reminder to the call of Islam, not a punishment to inflict any physical
harm). If at any time, she returns to obedience to Allah, swt, he should
stop any means of annoyance upon her.
The rights of a wife
include:
To have a muslim husband
whose general aqeedah (beliefs/creed) and minhaj (methodology) is Qur'an
and Sunnah
Halal marital relations
to the degree that they are able
To refuse to move,
travel, or be a co-wife if previously stipulated before
marriage
To be clothed and
fed as well as the husband, from his means.
Also that her
dependent children are so clothed and fed by her new husband where the provisions
of the biological father fall short (such as a deceased or deadbeat biological
father), unless stipulated otherwise prior to marriage. But then of course
they would have to stipulate how they intend to provide for the kids and
what they will do if the situation changes (such as the biological father
dies). The biological father is obligated first and foremost to provide
for them within his means, but the new husband is also responsible for the
protection and maintenance of those within his
care.
The husband
is responsible for maintaining the wife. If the wife has children from a
previous marriage, providing for her children is a need she has. The new
husband's job includes maintaining this aspect of the wife's
needs.
Men are the protectors and maintainers
of women, because Allâh has made one of them to excel the other, and
because they spend (to support them) from their means. ... (Qur'an
4:34)
The best of what you consume is that
which you have earned. And your children are part of what you have earned.
[al-Tirmidhi
and al-Nasai. Al-Albani has graded it sahih. Al-Albani, Sahih al-Jami,
vol. 1, p. 326.].
And give to the kindred his due and to
the Miskîn (poor) and to the wayfarer. But spend not wastefully (your
wealth) in the manner of a spendthrift .
[Qur'an
17:26]
...That you should feed them as you feed
yourselves, clothe them as you clothe yourselves
[Ahmed/sahih]
And the man is responsible for his household
and will be asked about his responsibility
[Bukhari]
Hind (bint 'Utba) said to the Prophet,
"Abu Sufyan is a miserly man and I need to take some money of his wealth."
The Prophet (saaws) said, "Take reasonably what is sufficient for you and
your children." [Bukhari 9.291, Narrated
'Aisha]
The Prophet (saaws) said, "You will
not find me to be miserly, cowardly, or a liar."
[Muwatta
21.22]
Allah's Messenger (saaws) said, "The
generous man is near Allah, near Paradise, near men and far from Hell, but
the miserly man is far from Allah, far from Paradise, far from men and near
Hell. Indeed, an ignorant man who is generous is dearer to Allah than a
worshipper who is miserly."
[Tirmidhi
1869, Narrated Abu Huraira]
Remember... Allah, Subhanahu wa Ta'ala, Knows everything we do!
Source:
WWW.MUTTAQUN.COM
Assalamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barkatuh!
* Marriage *
According to Qur'an and Sunnah
And those who say: "Our Lord! Bestow on us
from our wives and our offspring
who will be the comfort of our eyes,
and make us leaders for the Muttaqûn"
Those will be rewarded with the highest place
(in Paradise) because of their patience.
Therein they shall be met with greetings
and the word of peace and respect.
(Qur'an 25:74-75)
The
order to Marry
Hadith - Sahih Bukhari Volume 7, Book
62, No. 1, Narrated Anas bin Malik
A group of three men came to the houses of the
wives of the Prophet
asking how the Prophet worshipped (Allah), and when they were
informed about that, they considered their worship insufficient and said,
"Where are we from the Prophet as his past and future sins have been forgiven."
Then one of them said, "I will offer the prayer throughout the night forever."
The other said, "I will fast throughout the year and will not break my fast."
The third said, "I will keep away from the women and will not marry forever."
Allah's Apostle came to them and said, "Are you the same people who said
so-and-so? By Allah, I am more submissive to Allah and more afraid of Him
than you; yet I fast and break my fast, I do sleep and I also marry women.
So he who does not follow my tradition in religion, is not from me (not one
of my followers)."
Hadith - Sahih Bukhari, Volume 7, Book
62, Number 4, Narrated 'Abdullah
We were with the Prophet while we were young
and had no wealth whatever. So Allah's Apostle said, "O young people! Whoever
among you can marry, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and
guard his modesty (i.e. his private parts from committing illegal sexual
intercourse etc.), and whoever is not able to marry, should fast, as fasting
diminishes his sexual power."
Al-Mahr
(The Dowry)
The Noble Qur'an 4:4
And give to the women (whom you marry) their
Mahr (obligatory bridal money given by the husband to his wife at the time
of marriage) with a good heart, but if they, of their own good pleasure,
remit any part of it to you, take it, and enjoy it without fear of any harm.
The
Limit of What can be seen of the Woman
Whom One Seeks to Marry
Sheikh Ibn Baz, May Allah have Mercy on
him
Question: If a young man proposes marriage to a young lady
is it obligatory that he sees her? Also, is it correct that the young lady
uncover her head to show more of her beauty to her proposing fiance? Please
benefit us and may Allaah benefit you.
Answer: There is no harm (in the man seeing her), however it
is not obligatory. Rather, it is recommended that he sees her and she sees
him, because the Prophet (Sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam) commanded the one
who proposed marriage to look at the woman. This is because that is better
for causing agreement and harmony between them. So if she uncovers her face
for him, and her hands and her head, there is no harm in that according to
the correct opinion. Some of the people of knowledge have said that it is
sufficient for her to uncover the face and the two hands. However, the correct
opinion is that there is no harm in him seeing her head, face, hands and
feet, based upon the mentioned hadeeth (above). However, this is not
permissible with him being alone with her. Rather, her father, or brother,
or someone else must be with them. This is because the Prophet (Sallallaahu
'alayhi wa sallam) said, "A man must never be alone
with a woman unless there is someone who is a Mahram with them." (Agreed
upon in Saheeh Al-Bukhaaree and Saheeh Muslim.) He (Sallallaahu 'alayhi wa
sallam) also said, "A man must never be alone with
a woman, for verily the Satan is their third." (At-Tirmithee and Ahmad)
Source: Sheikh ibn Baz, Al-Fataawaa ash-Shar'iyyah
fil-Masaa'il il-'Asriyyah min Fataawaa 'Ulamaa' il-Balad il-Haraam, pp. 498-499.
Translated by Aqeel Walker
Rights
over one another
Hadith - Bukhari, Volume 3, Book 50, Number
882. Narrated Uqba bin Amir
Allah's Apostle
said,
"From among all
the conditions which you have to fulfill, the conditions which make it legal
for you to have sexual relations (i.e. the marriage contract) have the greatest
right to be fulfilled."
The following examples of behavior
of a husband are haram (prohibited) and can lead to disobedience (to Allah)
in the wife.
Al-Bahuti al-Hanbali, Kishaaf al-Qinaa’
an Matn al-Iqnaa’, vol. 5, pp. 184, 290, 213; Ibn Abideen, Radd al-Mukhtar
ala al-Darr al-Mukhtar wa Hashiyah, vol. 3, p. 190; Tafseer al-Manaar, vol.
5, p. 76.
"He [the husband] may cause his wife different
forms of harm, such as cursing her or her family, reviling her, verbally
abusing her for the tiniest of reasons. He may insult her because of her
family, if it is less prestigious or honorable than his. Or he may try to
bring harm to her by divorcing her and then, before the waiting period is
finished, bring her back as his wife and then divorce her again. All this
is done without the intention of returning to a real married life but simply
to harm her and transgress her rights. Or he may avoid having sexual intercourse
with her for no reason or legal sanction. This may lead the woman to lose
her chastity and doing something forbidden."
The Noble Qur'an Al-Baqarah
2:228
...And they (women) have rights (over their
husbands as regards living expenses, etc.) similar (to those of their husbands)
over them (as regards obedience and respect, etc.) to what is reasonable,
but men have a degree (of responsibility) over them. And Allâh is
All-Mighty, All-Wise.
Hadith - Al-Tirmidhi, Narrated Amr ibn
al-Ahwas al-Jushami
The Prophet
said,
"...Listen! You
have your rights upon your wives and they have their rights upon you. Your
right is that they shall not allow anyone you dislike, to trample your bed
and do not permit those whom you dislike to enter your home. Their right
is that you should treat them well in the matter of food and
clothing."
Hadith - Sahih Al-Bukhari 3.189, Narrated
Abu Juhaifa
Salman told Abu Ad-Darda', "Your Lord has a
right on you, your soul has a right on you, and your family has a right on
you; so you should give the rights of all those who has a right on you."
Abu Ad-Darda' came to the Prophet and narrated the whole story. The Prophet
said,
"Salman has spoken
the truth."
Hadith - Sahih Al-Bukhari 3.501, Narrated
Abu Huraira
...The Prophet
said,
"The best amongst
you is the one who pays the rights of others generously."
Hadith - Al-Tirmidhi #276, Narrated Amr
ibn al-Ahwas al-Jushami
Amr heard the Prophet
say in his farewell address on the eve of his Last Pilgrimage,
after he had glorified and praised Allah, he cautioned his followers:
'Listen! Treat women kindly; they are like prisoners
in your hands. Beyond this you do not owe anything from them. Should they
be guilty of flagrant misbehaviour, you may remove them from your beds, and
beat them but do not inflict upon them any severe punishment. Then if they
obey you, do not have recourse to anything else against them. Listen! You
have your rights upon your wives and they have their rights upon you. Your
right is that they shall not allow anyone you dislike, to trample your bed
and do not permit those whom you dislike to enter your home. Their right
is that you should treat them well in the matter of food and clothing.'
[Transmitted
by Tirmidhi]
The Noble Qur'an 5:1
O you who believe! Fulfill (your) obligations.
...
Words of Advice to the Husband and the Wife
by: Sheikh al Albaani
The husband and wife need to be compliant,
cooperative and conciliatory toward one another, and to advise each other
and urge each other toward obedience to Allah subhana wa ta'ala, following
all of His ruling which have been clearly established in the Qur'an and the
Sunnah. These must never be superceded by blind following of any religious
or other figures, or any custom or school of thought which has predominated
among the people.
Allah aza wa jal says "It is not for a believer, man or
woman, when Allâh and His Messenger have decreed a matter that they
should have any option in their decision. And whoever disobeys Allâh
and His Messenger, he has indeed strayed in a plain error.
" [al ahzab:33-36]
Each of them should fully carry out the duties
and responsibilities with which Allah has obligated them toward the other...thus,
the wife should not try to have all of the same rights as her husband, and
the husband must never exploit the role of leadership and authority to which
he has been assigned in the marriage relationship to oppress her, strike
her or to be otherwise unfair to her.
Allah says: "And women shall have rights similar
to the rights against them, according to what is equitable; but men have
a degree of advantage over them. And Allah is Exalted in Power, Wise. [al
baqarah:228]
Allah also says, "Men are the protectors and
maintainers of women, because Allâh has made one of them to excel the
other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means. Therefore
the righteous women are devoutly obedient (to Allâh and to their husbands),
and guard in the husband's absence what Allâh orders them to guard
(e.g. their chastity, their husband's property, etc.). As to those women
on whose part you see illconduct, admonish them (first), (next), refuse
to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful), but
if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance).
Surely, Allâh is Ever Most High, Most Great.
" [an-nisaa:34]
Mu'awiya ibn Haida radi Allahu anhu said "O
rasulullah, what rights do our wives have over us?" Rasulullah salallahu
alayhi wa sallam said "That you should feed them as you feed yourselves,
clothe them as you clothe yourselves, never invoke ugliness upon them, (referring
to the custom of the Arabs when they are angry they say 'May Allah make your
face ugly) never strike them in the face, and in boycotting the marital bed,
do not go outside of the house to sleep. How (could you do any of these things)
after you have entered into one another, so do only that which is allowed
with regard to her (for valid reasons). [ahmed/sahih]
In another hadith rasulullah sallallahu alayhi
wa sallam said "The doers of justice will be on thrones of light at Allah's
right Hand and both of Allah's hands are right hands- whose who were just
in their ruling, with their families and in all that over which there were
given authority." [Muslim]
When they both know and practice this, Allah
subhana wa ta'ala grants them a good life and they will live for as long
as they remain together- in the bliss of happiness.
Allah says, "Whoever works
righteousness, man or woman, and has Faith, verily, to him will We give a
new Life, a life that is good and pure, and We will bestow on such their
reward according to the best of their actions." [an nahl:97]
A
Pious Poor Man is a Better Marriage Suitorthan a Rich Man Who
is Not Pious
Hadith - Bukhari 7.28, Narrated
Sahl
A man passed by Allah's Apostle and Allah's
Apostle asked (his companions) "What do you say about this (man)?" They replied,
"If he asks for a lady's hand, he ought to be given her in marriage; and
if he intercedes (for someone) his intercessor should be accepted; and if
he speaks, he should be listened to." Allah's Apostle kept silent, and then
a man from among the poor Muslims passed by, an Allah's Apostle asked (them)
"What do you say about this man?" They replied, "If he asks for a lady's
hand in marriage he does not deserve to be married, and he intercedes (for
someone), his intercession should not be accepted; And if he speaks, he should
not be listened to." Allah's Apostle (saaws) said,
"This poor man
is better than so many of the first as filling the
earth."
Hadith - Al-Tirmidhi #3090, Narrated Abu
Hurairah, r.a.
Allah's Messenger (peace be upon him) said,
'When someone with whose religion and character you are satisfied asks your
daughter in marriage, accede to his request. If you do not do so, there will
be temptation on Earth and extensive corruption.'
[Tirmidhi,
Nasa'i and Ibn Majah transmitted it.]
Action Items for
the
uttaqun:
Single Muslims should
have intentions to marry as soon as Islamically permissible and a suitable
candidate for marriage is available.
For a female,
it is permissible to marry at any time near puberty.
For a man,
he is ordered to marry after puberty once he has established a means to support
a family.
It is recommended
(in order to avoid being jailed) to not marry until old enough according
to the laws in the land they live, but it is Islamically permissible before
that.
Neither should
refuse marriage to a suitable Muslim marriage candidate.
A woman is
permitted (if she so chooses) to marry a poor man of good character, but
she must not marry a non-Muslim.
A muslim man
may only marry a Muslim or non-polytheist christian or Jew who is
chaste.
A mahr/dowry (gift
from the man to the new wife) should be agreed upon before the actual marriage.
The dowry can
be anything halal that they agree upon and it is obligatory that she is given
a dowry. It is recommended that the dowry is something appropriate to his
income level and ability to give.
Although jewelry
is permissible to be given as the dower or part of the dower, it should not
be an imitation of christian traditions, such as a diamond ring worn on the
left third finger and given as part of the marriage
ceremony.
A marriage should
be witnessed by at least two men, or four women, or one man and two
women.
Give your spouse his/her
rights. If your rights are not being given to you, ASK ALLAH for these
rights.
The Prophet (sallallahu aleihi wa sallam) said, "Soon others will be preferred
to you, and there will be things which you will not like." The companions
of the Prophet asked, "O Allah's Apostle! What do you order us to do (in
this case)?" He said, "(I order you) to give the rights that are on you
and to ask your rights from Allah." [Sahih
Al-Bukhari 4.800, Narrated Ibn Masud]
The rights of a husband
include:
Halal marital relations
to the degree that they are able
That the wife will
guard in the husband's absence what Allah has ordered her to guard (i.e.
her chastity, his property, secrets in the bed between the
two)
That she would not
fast while in his presence, without his permission.
If it is an
obligatory fast, he still has rights to deny it if he has a valid reason,
such as believing that the fast would be a severe risk to her health, and
he must allow the obligatory fast of Ramadan if there is no valid reason
to forbid it.
As to when
she is to make up the Ramadan fast days that she did not make due to her
menstrual, he must cooperate with her desires to make it up promptly, but
he still can deny that the fast be done at certain times as he decides what
he believes is best for her and for the marriage overall.
For non-obligated
fasts, he should encourage the piety of fasting in general, but he is
not obligated to permit each request to fast if they will be in each
other's presence during the fast.
To move the wife,
have her travel with him, or to have up to four wives unless previously
stipulated before marriage
That she will not
spend his money against his halal orders
That she will not
permit anyone to enter his house except with his
permission
If seeing ill behavior
from the wife, he has the right to first admonish her, then after
that he may refuse to share the bed, then he may beat her lightly
(in a way that does not leave marks or damage the body, as this is for a
reminder to the call of Islam, not a punishment to inflict any physical
harm). If at any time, she returns to obedience to Allah, swt, he should
stop any means of annoyance upon her.
The rights of a wife
include:
To have a muslim husband
whose general aqeedah (beliefs/creed) and minhaj (methodology) is Qur'an
and Sunnah
Halal marital relations
to the degree that they are able
To refuse to move,
travel, or be a co-wife if previously stipulated before
marriage
To be clothed and
fed as well as the husband, from his means.
Also that her
dependent children are so clothed and fed by her new husband where the provisions
of the biological father fall short (such as a deceased or deadbeat biological
father), unless stipulated otherwise prior to marriage. But then of course
they would have to stipulate how they intend to provide for the kids and
what they will do if the situation changes (such as the biological father
dies). The biological father is obligated first and foremost to provide
for them within his means, but the new husband is also responsible for the
protection and maintenance of those within his
care.
The husband
is responsible for maintaining the wife. If the wife has children from a
previous marriage, providing for her children is a need she has. The new
husband's job includes maintaining this aspect of the wife's
needs.
Men are the protectors and maintainers
of women, because Allâh has made one of them to excel the other, and
because they spend (to support them) from their means. ... (Qur'an
4:34)
The best of what you consume is that
which you have earned. And your children are part of what you have earned.
[al-Tirmidhi
and al-Nasai. Al-Albani has graded it sahih. Al-Albani, Sahih al-Jami,
vol. 1, p. 326.].
And give to the kindred his due and to
the Miskîn (poor) and to the wayfarer. But spend not wastefully (your
wealth) in the manner of a spendthrift .
[Qur'an
17:26]
...That you should feed them as you feed
yourselves, clothe them as you clothe yourselves
[Ahmed/sahih]
And the man is responsible for his household
and will be asked about his responsibility
[Bukhari]
Hind (bint 'Utba) said to the Prophet,
"Abu Sufyan is a miserly man and I need to take some money of his wealth."
The Prophet (saaws) said, "Take reasonably what is sufficient for you and
your children." [Bukhari 9.291, Narrated
'Aisha]
The Prophet (saaws) said, "You will
not find me to be miserly, cowardly, or a liar."
[Muwatta
21.22]
Allah's Messenger (saaws) said, "The
generous man is near Allah, near Paradise, near men and far from Hell, but
the miserly man is far from Allah, far from Paradise, far from men and near
Hell. Indeed, an ignorant man who is generous is dearer to Allah than a
worshipper who is miserly."
[Tirmidhi
1869, Narrated Abu Huraira]
Remember... Allah, Subhanahu wa Ta'ala, Knows everything we do!
Source:
WWW.MUTTAQUN.COM
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